“You need to be aggressive in order to be successful! If you aren’t fighting, you’re losing!” – Business e-mail I received today.
I was not aggressive when I worked in juvenile justice and I was able to stay in that field for 20 years. I worked with literally hundreds of teenage boys and assisted many in putting their lives back together and getting the skills they needed to make it on their own.
I was not aggressive when I raised my son on my own and helped him become a kind, tolerant human being who sees everyone as having worth.
I was not aggressive when I was in relationships and worked hard on being someone who treated my partner with respect and kindness while being as loving and attentive as I was capable of being.
I am not aggressive with my friends, and do what I can to be there for them, to listen to them when they needed an ear, assist when they needed help, and enjoy their company when we are together.
I am not aggressive with my podcast, writing or other creative ventures and do everything in my power to help other people build their audience if I can.
Not everyone is made to be aggressive. I’m not in sales, and I learned in a single afternoon in a outgoing call center that I am NOT aggressive when it comes to selling things. I’m not aggressive toward other people because I believe that if someone has to be “won over” they won’t stick with you for long. I’m not aggressive in my beliefs because I no longer feel the need to win anyone over to my way to thinking, we ALL have our own way of thinking and that’s beautiful.
It’s fine if you are aggressive as long as you aren’t a jerk about it. But the whole “everything is competition” grows more and more hollow to me the more I realize that together we build things and in competition we destroy each other.
If that’s losing, then I’m OK with it.