I have had two very memorable New Year’s Eves in the last few years. The first was when I was dating a woman whose birthday was 12/31, and I was being laid off from my job that day. My coworkers held a “good bye” happy hour, because we used every excuse to throw a happy hour, and it was back when I would get drunk, so we had a lot of fun.
The future XGF and I got good and sloshed and headed back to her place. As midnight drew close, we were…um….doing what you do to celebrate, especially if you are drunk. She said, “Hold on, I need to get something,” and left the bedroom.
After five minutes, I called out, asking if everything was ok. Got no reply.
Got dressed and went out to look around the apartment and she was gone.
Figured that maybe she forgot something in the car or whatever and turned on the TV to wait.
At 15 minutes, I realized that if I left, I’d be leaving her apartment unlocked, and while it wasnt’ a terrible apartment building, it wasn’t exactly a great one.
So, I waited.
And after an hour, she came back. I asked where she’d gone, and she said, “I wanted to get some weed.”
“It took an hour?”
“They wanted me to smoke up with them.”
I took this as my cue to leave.
A couple of weeks later, she asked to get coffee, and me being a forgiving sort, I agreed, wondering if it was just a situation where she’d gotten too high to remember to come back, she had other issues going on, etc. We met at a coffee place, and started talking and she talked around the issue. When I finally asked why she left FOR AN HOUR on New Year’s Eve, her reply was “You know how much I love weed!”
My reply was, “I think we’re done here.”
Someone overheard it and posted it on a “Overheard in Minneapolis” website.
THE NEXT YEAR I was dating a woman who didn’t like watching old movies. In fact, when we would have movie nights, she said, “No movies made before 2000.” Fine, I guess…you know, the things we do for love and all. New Year’s Eve, we are both pretty exhausted as we worked at the same group home, and she had three kids, so we just wanted a quiet night. I made dinner, she rented movies and we settled in to watch them…and by 10 pm, she was asleep on my lap.
And the movie she’d chosen was “Eat, Love, Pray” which is one of the most cloying, clichéd things I had seen in ages, while TCM was having a Marx Brothers marathon. The remove was ALMOST out of reach, so I very quietly and moving slowly so as not to wake her up, got the remote, turned off the DVD and turned on Animal Crackers. At 10:30, Duck Soup, the greatest comedy in history began, and I watched it with a clenched jaw making sure I didn’t laugh out loud and wake her up.
Do you have any idea how hard it is NOT to laugh at Duck Soup?
The move ended around midnight, and she started to stir, so I quickly changed the channel to something I knew she’d want to watch, and when she woke up, she what I did while she was sleeping…and I said I was letter her get some rest.
Not that I took advantage of her being asleep to watch a movie from the 1930’s that I knew she wouldn’t let me watch.
I have other New Year’s Eve stories, but I think those two are the most recent.